Walking Through the Fire

What do we do when confusion sets in and we don’t know which way is up? When we are gasping for air and feel like we are going to combust? Who do we turn to? Who do we believe? Do we listen to the words of man or to the words that God speaks to our heart. Do we tremble in fear or stay steadfast in the face of the storm? Do we choose to dance in his grace or join the melancholy anguish of those around us?

Those are the questions that I’ve been pondering lately and that lay anchored to my soul. I have entered a season of questioning, grieving and stress. But in spite of all of this I have found moments of peace, love and even joy. I have no doubt that all of these emotions are a gift from heaven. How could they be not? There is no question. Why then, do I feel guilt? Guilt for having a joyful heart, as the world crumbles around me. Guilt does not come from the Lord. It is a poison for our soul and only comes from one place. Having joy in times of adversity is something that makes the enemy quake in his loins. He knows that people are watching around us and he wants us to curse His name and show our angst against the Lord. So I choose joy. I choose to dance in the thunder and lighting. I choose to listen to his words. I choose HIM. I choose to walk through the flames of disaster and let HIM put them out and cover me in shelter with his wings of golden feathers.

Mama, I know He has you. I know He will protect you. I know He will get us through this. I know He has a plan. I know He loves us and will not forsake us. I know because he is who he says he is and he’s the God of promises and hope.

The Armor of God

 

Depression. What does it feel like? What is it? I always describe it as a dark abyss….a sea of nothingness.  Where you are aware of everything around you and nothing at all. Where you feel the earth pressing down on you, but you feel so empty. When you can’t differentiate up from down or left from right.  It just happens…sets in and makes a home.  But Why? Why does it find it’s way into our hearts and why do we give it a space to call home? I’ll tell you why, because it’s finds a crack….a hole…a chink in our armor and let’s itself in.  We let our defenses down and in it comes.  So what do we do? In the darkest of dark I would pray Ephesians 6:17 over and over again. I would imagine myself putting on my armor and getting ready for battle. It would try and cover myself in so much holy spirit, that hopefully nothing else would get in. The truth is…sometimes it does get in.  Does this mean that we are not full enough of God and we have room left in our hearts? Absolutely not! Often in warfare the battle wages in waves of wins and losses.  It doesn’t always have an epic finale when we want it to.  Often, we are at war for a reason and sometimes the war is getting us ready for a revolution.  The revolution of ourselves, our families and life yet to come.  So why do we often wave the white flag and give up? I’ll tell you why.  I have stood with my toes on the edge of insanity….wiggling….face looking over into the abyss and thinking that I had come to the end.  I’ve been there! I have walked through the valley and I hate to tell you this….I’ve walked through it more then once.

In my darkest times I prayed for instant healing! To be one of those that God miraculously touches instantly.  I wasn’t though and I’m still not.  I still have a revolution going on inside of me and I know the battle isn’t over yet.  I have a call to rally those around me to pick up their swords and fight the battle that wages in the depths of their souls. To unite our inequities and fight together for the peace of our souls.  TO NOT hide within the shadows in fear and shame, but to stand proud and united in HIM.  To not lower our heads in embarrassment, but to stand proud and declare that I am WONDERFULLY and BEAUTIFULLY MADE! So are you! You are not defected or broken…you are just a mosaic of beautifully shining broken glass.  The TRUE artist knows what you are supposed to look like, but to the human eye you look broken, ugly, torn and bedraggled.  HE however did not create you to look this way, HE created you for great and mighty things. To declare your battle cry and trample over the lies that enemy has fostered in your heart for TOO long! Don’t let him make a home in the shallows of the abyss because though you feel alone, he is waiting to take up partnership with you.  He is waiting for you to bring down the castle drawbridge and lower your gates.

Often, our gates get lowered by life. What does that even mean? We get so caught up in the hustle and bustle that we lose sight of US and of HIM.  That’s why in battle we often have to lose ourselves, in order to find ourselves.  We have to be beaten and bedraggled…in order to be reborn and remade.  Battle wasn’t meant to be easy, but it is what wins wars.  So don’t stand behind the castle walls waiting for the battle to stop…it’s time to take up arms and fight.  Take up your sword, put on your helmet, and hold up your shield.  This battle does not determine who is going to win the war, but who will win the revolution for your soul.  Don’t lose sight of your fellow comrades that are fighting along side of you, because everyone has a battle that they are waging.  Stand side by side with them, because two swords are better then one.  “If you want to run fast, run alone.  If you want to run far, run together (African proverb).”

Who will you take up arms with? Who will you stop to pick up? Who will you save from the depths of Hell? Now as I am writing this, I know that some of you are in a time of pause or rest.  You aren’t meant to gather the troops yet, because you are still working on your armor.  You are crafting your sword and making it from the strongest metal.  You are not ready for a revolution because your battle has not begun. You have not gathered your quiver of arrows for battle! BUT! For those of us who are ready…we MUST fight together! WE MUST trust in our fellow comrades and WE MUST not fight alone! When an animal hunts it singles out the weakest of the herd and tries to get it away from it’s protection.  Let that not be you! Don’t single yourself out and run from your protection! Clasp together and form a bond that cannot be broken! “For two are better then one!”

 

Getting Rid of the “Shoulds”

Image result for seize the day dead poets society quote

 

 

As I sit here I am squished between a toddler and a hesitant dachshund.  It makes me realize how important it is to appreciate the moments we have in life and not look towards the next best thing.  Often we get caught in the if only, next time and the I will do this when moments in life.  We don’t realize that in order to live our best life, we need to do it right now. We cannot wait for the next chapter to turn, because each page of a book makes it worth reading.  We need to harness the hear and now…..not the I can’t wait until when.

The above has been me for the last thirty-seven years of my existence.  I am always looking towards tomorrow and never do I appreciate today.  I look towards the future and neglect the hear and now.  I always live my life in a forward motion, but don’t appreciate things until they are over.  I recently celebrated my thirty seventh revolution around the sun. A good friend asked me what I wanted in this next year and what I hoped for.  I thought what do I want?!  I have no idea! What should I want? What should I plan for? What should I want to want? Do you see the commonality in those sentences? The word is “should.” My whole life has evolved around that very word…how should I look, what should I wear, how should I act, what should I say..etc..etc.etc. You get the point.  It might appear that the last thirty seven years have been a farce, because in reality I have been doing everything the world said I “should” do.

What if we took out the “shoulds.” This last year has by far been the hardest, most challenging and earth shattering year of my life.  I had to take out the future and only live in the here and now.  My world came crashing down and I couldn’t live in the when, but only the minute, the hour or the day( if was feeling really good).  My most cherished sister friend told me one day, what if you take out the “shoulds.” What if you live each day in the present and only do things that bring you joy.  What if you took a pause from the “have to” and only do what sparks love in your heart.  I was perplexed and aghast.

So what if we raised our children this way? What if we told them that we don’t always have to do what the world says we “should” do. What if we taught them to appreciate the here and now.  What if we taught them to do the things that spark joy in their hearts.  What if we taught them to think with their hearts more often then their heads.  Would the world fall apart? What would happen? Would society end as we know it? I don’t think so. I am a firm believer that we all have joy in our hearts.  That we all have an inherit passion to love, help, and show grace. It just gets lost in the “shoulds.” Because when you “should” do it, is so much different then when you want to do it.

How do you teach little ones? How do you pass this wisdom down to their little hearts? You already are.  They are watching you under the microscope of life, but unfortunately we are so busy with the “shoulds” that they can only see us using a telescope because we are so far away from the present.

This is my challenge to you.  Take the “shoulds” out for one day. Just one. And see how your life changes. How does your heart feel? Mother Theresea once said, “if you want to change the world, go home and love your family.” My theory is this: if you love your family by taking out the “shoulds” you will find the passion that lies within each one of them, the innate love that exists within and the joy that is bursting at the seems to get out.  I challenge you to PAUSE….look down and see all that God has created.  Stop living for future and appreciate today.  PAUSE…REFLECT…..AND BREATHE.

I would love to know if you decide to take this challenge on and how it changed you? Let go…Carpe Diem!

 

I release you!

white and red plastic heart balloon on sky during daytime

In the last couple of weeks I have jokingly called myself the “Pied Piper” of anxiety. I’ve had countless students and parents in my office and do you know what always comes up…..anxiety. Dark….smelly……dirty…..ANXIETY! I decided a couple of years ago that I refused to hide in the dark and that I would use my anxiety for GREATNESS! You heard me…..GREATNESS! I would overcome, I would defeat and I would share my story with others.  No longer would I hide in shame about my anxiety! No longer would I minimize  it! I’m not going to lie….when I decided to do this my anxiety actually got worse.  It did not want to let go! It had made it’s home and I would have to fight to get out from it’s grasp.

For so long I had told myself, I have anxiety and anxiety defined who I was.  I was no longer a person, I was a person with anxiety. It was my persona and often even my excuse.  It wrapped itself around me and became infused and charred in my DNA.  I never thought I could break myself free of it, but just exist, hide and control it.  Do you have something you like to control? Maybe it’s not anxiety.  Maybe it’s depression or some kind of dependency.  You try to control every aspect of it, but the truth is….if you don’t bring it into the light (and continue to hide it in shame and darkness), it is actually controlling you.  You think that you have the upper hand, but in reality it is pressing down on you and controlling your every breath.

So what do you do?   How do you move on from a life that has consumed you for so long and has become who you are? Maybe you just say goodbye…that’s what I did.  No really! I wrote my old self a goodbye letter and gave it permission to move on, because I did not need it anymore.  You see, the self we release served a purpose somewhere down the line.  Maybe it was for self preservation, the result of trauma or wall we built up for protection.  Whatever it’s purpose, it can still be released!

My Letter to Myself:

Dear Capable Jen,

I want to thank you for all that you’ve done for me and I want to say sorry for everything you had to endure.  You had to learn to be strong and hold in your emotions in order to survive.  You had to endure a childhood that lacked the nurture that you craved and that left you feeling abandoned and sad.  You were taught ideals that were not true and you learned things by watching those around you.  Many of which, were lies.  You put on a smile and sucked up your way through life. 

You were strong when you heard the pooping of the alcohol in the morning, when your mom wouldn’t play with you, when she didn’t want to spend time with you, watch you play or just connect with you.  You were strong, as you watcher her hallucinate and come to her worst.  You dealt with a verbally abusive father, who filled your head with lies and tried to control you with his fears.  You took care of yourself when they abandoned you and did everything an adult would do, when you were still a child. 

You smiled as you were made fun of, teased and tried to fit in and were lost.  You worked hard at school and were always the optimal employee.  You strived for the attention of men and the praise from those around you.  You held strong through a verbally and emotionally abusive marriage, that left you abandoned again. 

You have endured so much and I wouldn’t be where I am without you.  However, it’s time to let you go.  I’m safe now.  I have people who love me for me, an amazing family, have forgiven my parents and have a deeper relationship with God.  It’s time for you to leave and let amazing, beautiful,, funny, and caring Jen move into and fulfill the destiny God has for her.  I’m fine now.  I need you to leave my backpack, because it’ time to give you up as I walk up the mountain.  I need to finish this journey as Jen.  The new Jen.  The Jen who loves herself and who is ENOUGH!.  Who doesn’t have guilt, to please people, and who strives for the glory of God.  The Jen who is kind to herself because she has done nothing wrong. 

Father God, I ask that you take capable Jen by the hand and cover her with your feathers.  Give her the love she so desperately needed all these years and take her hand.  Fly her into heaven.  Take good care of her, because she has endured so much! Capable Jen, go and be free! Don’t worry about me.  You have done your job and now it’s time to fly home.  To a home you always longed for and never got.  Father God, I release capable Jen to you and ask that you take all of her with you!  

Now here’s the hard part.  After you say goodbye….it’s time to forgive! To forgive those who have hurt you, to forgive yourself and maybe even forgive God.  Because it’s when we forgive, that we encounter true freedom! Freedom from our oppressors and freedom from ourselves!

Freedom does not come FREE!

low section of man against sky

Did you know that you were born free? That you were not created to be bound by your hands, your feet nor your mouth! You were created to fly high and soar over mountains! You were created to stand out! To Shine! And most importantly to GLITTER! What do all of these things have in common? They are things that should not be hidden in the dark. They should be set out for all those to see and for the world to appreciate.  Why then do people lose their sparkle? Why do nuggets of gold grow tarnished and are thrown to the side in reckless abandonment?

So many things in life cause our souls to tarnish and our hearts to grow hard.  Many are caused by the circumstances of life, the pain inflicted by others and the pain we continue to cause to ourselves. We cause ourselves PAIN? YES! ABSOLUTELY! We cause ourselves pain when we choose to not move on, to take ourselves out of a bad situation, when we don’t listen to that small still voice inside of our heads and when we don’t listen to the wise counsel of others.  Pride often gets in our way and hinders our advancement to the mountaintops.  What then shall we do?  In order to break the chains of circumstance, betrayal, lies, deceit and misery, we need to look inwards to see what we need to do in order to be the catalyst to be our own fire that will melt that chains that entrap us.  WE can be our own blacksmith and WE can hammer away at the iron that holds us down and prevents us flying like HE created us to. You were meant to soar, not slither nor glide.  Soaring takes accuracy, wind, speed and endurance. Most of these things you need to be able to do on your own and the rest comes from HIM.

As I have been walking on this journey, I learned so many things about myself and realized I had so much to unearth! I had been underground for 36 years and it was going to take some effort to be fertilized and grow.  It was not going to happen overnight, but it was going to be a process.  A process of reflection, insight and hard work.  I was going to have to dig down deep, if I wanted to reap the rewards.  Do you have to work hard? NOPE…not at all…..not if you want to keep doing the same thing over and over again….expecting the same result (see what I did there).  Did you read the title? Freedom does not come free! It comes at a cost and often it costs us our pride and the things that we thought were most crucial to our existence.  Once all of those have been stripped down and washed away…then and only then can we truly be free.

Freedom has to be constantly worked on, you cannot become free and just leave it at that.  You have to constantly turn inward and ask yourself if you are becoming bound to someone or something.  You have to be honest with yourself and honest with others.  Freedom can be a dirty business and often we need the help of others to get clean.

I know that for some people the unspeakable has happened to them. That they have fallen to the hands of abuse (physical and mental), lies, corruption, torment and pain.  However, you can still be FREE! Who the son sets free is free indeed! You can choose to take that initial step into freedom! Come join me on the journey to freedom! Will it be easy? Nope…but it’s so worth it.  To see a world that glitters in gold and when you can find the gold dust amongst our fellow weary travelers is an amazing sight to see. I am a firm believer that our journey is not in vain and that it gives us authority to speak to others who have been or who are on the path that we are or have traveled.  Your journey is not in VAIN! It’s the roadmap that others need, in order to find their way to the top of the mountain.  You hold the key! Will you choose to turn it or will you wear it around your neck as adornment and use it as an excuse that you rings in the ears of all those around you? It’s your choice! You can either choose freedom or choose to stay shackled! What will it be? What will be your freedom’s song? What will you sing from the mountaintop? It doesn’t matter what tune! Because not matter what, it will still be a beautiful melody that calls those around you home.

Sing with me! I AM FREE…..but the question lies in whether you will choose to be!

Darkness does not stand a chance…if you have light.

This weekend represented so much to my husband and me. It was some much needed time together and it also represented VICTORY! Many times as I laid in a heap of tears, anger, fear and confusion, I wondered if my life would ever be the same again and if my marriage would survive this wrecking ball because you have to be destroyed in order to be rebuilt.

My husband often asked if we would ever be able to go out again, plan, have adventures and travel. The truth was I didn’t know. I had no idea how I would come out of this, but God promised me I would and I held onto that promise. Because that promise was the only thing that kept me going and that promise extinguished the flames of darkness that smoldered in my brain every minute of the day. Some days I had to remind myself of that promise every minute, every hour and sometimes every second. I had to hold onto it because I was afraid if I let go, I would fall deeper into the abyss of nothingness and despair.

My husband would occasionally speak his fear because he too was afraid of me letting go and watching me fall down the rabbit hole. Even if he didn’t speak it, the fear and worry was written all over his face. He had to stay strong, but his body often gave him away. Fear engulfs everyone around you like a title wave, but the beauty of the wave is that it takes everything with it out to sea. You can either choose to get lost in the ocean or let it strip you clean of everything. Shame, humility, fear and embarrassment. It will either bring you to your knees or sweep the grains of sand right from beneath your feet.

The absence of fear never really exists because fear does serve an intended purpose….if we let it. It stains all the areas of weakness that are present and allows us to see where it’s creeping in and how we need to stop it in its path.

For me control was the big catalyst of my fear and the fear of losing control stoked my anxiety.

I heard God telling me that I was trying to control things that were beyond my control. He controlled the wind, the waves and the seas. I could not control everything. He told me that giving up control was my biggest vice and it would be my greatest victory. I could not control the sun or the moon..only he could. The earth rotates because He told it to. Life was not up to me and not everything could be planned. It had served me well, but it was time to let it go.

Control would will strangle you like a serpent and leave you dead in its wake. You cannot control people, you cannot control things and I could not control Him. He had a plan and a purpose, but I just hadn’t seen it. He created the heavens and the earth with a purpose and did the same with you and me. Victory would be mine, but patience was key.

I needed to delight in the small victories and the miracles that had been happening around me. They were not in vain, but were there to lead me to victory.

I needed to lean on those around me because my weakness gave them strength. Strength to falter, strength to make mistakes and strength to ask for help. He was glorified through my weakness because he sent people to help me. I needed to open my eyes and heart and..shut my mind off. My mind is an amazing tool, but it was destroying me at that moment. My heart needed to lead the way and the door needed to be opened.

There would be no more have tos or obligations…only joy. He did not create me with guilt..only love. I had shut love off a long time ago because it was easier then getting hurt. I need to love with my whole heart and not just part of it. Love was a gift and a great power. When I truly love it emanates from my body and the people around me feel it. That’s true love. Sustaining love. Soul quenching love. I needed to go out and love out of joy and not obligation. Love is not forced. It is the holiest of gifts. A gift not everyone deserves to the fullest extent. It was time to change my mental framework and view myself like He did. Like my husband did. He created me and he did not create a mistake. I was to love myself, like I loved others. I was to choose joy because heavens gates are opened with love and so are our spirits.

When you love out of joy, that shows your true leadership. A forced love never shines. It was time to shine my light and let my heart lead the way. Darkness does not stand a chance in the light of love. It slithers and hides because it’s blinded by the glory.

Heaven was not formed out of guilt, but out of His love for mankind. A father loves his children like no other and I would feel this love again. He promised me that I would twirl and dance and laugh until my sides hurt because it was music to a father’s ears

He delighted in my joy, my happiness and splendor. Love would grow like a fire being stoked by the wind. I just needed to take down the barriers that were blocking it. Once I did this I would see His glory.

Glory was not meant for heaven alone, but the people on earth. My family had taught me obligation and guilt. I needed to unlearn it. I needed to learn to love myself without guilt or condemnation because I was teaching my children to love themselves. My children could not do this if I did not love and nurture myself. Mind, body and spirit.

I had abused my body no longer. It could not go on. I needed to heal in order to love again, but healing would come from the inside. I needed to love myself like he loved me, not because He has to but because I bring Him great joy! Not for what I do, but because of the person He created me to be. I needed to love others in the same way.

  • Choose truth instead of guilt, shame and condemnation.
  • Release my old self and look towards my new self.
  • Sever soul ties with people and events.
  • Picture guilt, shame and condemnation and handing them over to God. Asking God what he wanted to replace them with.

I’m afraid of the dark…

lighted candle

My entire life I have been afraid of the dark.  Terrified. Frozen. Heart beating as I stand there in the emptiness of night.  There is something about the dark that is both calming and frightening, all tangled into one velvety dark mess.

Am I afraid of the boogieman?  Maybe.  The creatures that lurk under the bed? Could be.  To be honest I have no idea, what makes it so scary.  Maybe it’s the idea of being all alone in the absence of light.  Light gives our eyes the ability to see and our body the nourishment it needs.  So what then is the darks purpose? Is is to bring rest? Rejuvenation?  Or maybe just the ability to quiet your mind and come in contact will all that encompasses the world around you.

On my honeymoon I went black water rafting in the glowworm caves in NZ.  The guide explained that the absence of light for too long of a period of time, could drive a person to insanity.  Insanity?! Not just a little crazy, but insane.  How can the dark have so much power and what control did it harness to be able to control our minds and bodies?

In my darkest days, I saw no light.  I laid there with the inability to move, eat, sleep or even interact.  I was a velvety dark mess.  My mind raced.  My body ran a marathon each day.  I could not see the light.  The absence of light caused me to spin into a dark deep “pit.” A pit that was so deep, I had no idea how to get out or save myself.  I fell deeper and deeper down the rabbit hole.  I thought I was going insane.  I thought this was the end.  Thoughts of suicide entered my head and nested to make a home.  I tried to see the flicker of light, a flame or even the dim light from someone’s lamp.  There were days where I called those chosen few a million times a day.  Just so I could borrow some oil from their lamp and their truth could set flame to the oil they shared.  I took more in this season then I could ever give back.  It was a season of taking because I could barely take care of myself.

I asked God if I was going insane.  Why was he doing this to me and I was frightened that I would never come out of it.  I was the lucky one.  I held onto the flicker of hope that I held in my heart, that this journey was not in vain.  That I would come out of this and cross into the promised land.  No one could help me out.  It had to be me.  I had to climb, struggle and break free of all that held me down and that which was strangling the life out of me.  I could not be pulled free, but just keep borrowing the oil from the lamps around me.

Often it was just me and God.  Alone for hours and days and months.  Just us.  He heard my cries, my screams and my fits of terror.  He did not abandon or forsake me, but gave me the tools to break free and journey another day.  The weaker I grew..the stronger I became.  Not physically, not mentally, but spiritually. I never knew how much I would need God, until I stood on the precipice of insanity.  That’s when Hell becomes real and the hopes of Heaven become the grains of hope that you hold onto.

I was the lucky one, because I was able to eventually see the light.  The absence of light drove me to the edge of insanity, but I chose to look towards the light.  The light of those around me, the light of what this journey might serve, the light of what it meant for my family and the promise of never falling backward, but only moving forward.

I chose to hold onto the light.  What will you do? You do not have to do this alone! Seek help.  Grab a map and a hand.  Borrow some oil and light your own lamp.  The absence of light is scary, but if we never had darkness…we would never be able to see the light!  For it is in our darkest hours, that we are made strong and it is in the darkest night, that the stars become our compass home.

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is a national network of local crisis centers that provides free and confidential emotional support to people in suicidal crisis or emotional distress 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. We’re committed to improving crisis services and advancing suicide prevention by empowering individuals, advancing professional best practices, and building awareness https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/.

I will live in fear no longer!

black and white black and white depressed depression

 

I was born into a family where fear gripped every inch of our lives.  We were fearful of the thoughts of  those around us and the words they might say.  We feared God and his heavy hand and the punishment he might lay down before us.  We feared each other to the point where we didn’t share our heart’s desires and it left us in a state of suspense…not moving forward or backwards.

I was taught to fear the dark and all that rested in it.  I was taught that the devil was just behind me and that if I looked into a mirror at night, I would see him.  I was taught that dead relatives would come down from heaven and haunt me.  I was taught that if I made a mistake and was punished,  God was laying down the law.  I was taught to love out of fear, do things out of fear and avoid things out of fear.

The enemy ran rampant in our lives, whispering his lies on a daily basis and sitting back to watch the havoc he created.  Fear flowed through my family like liquid magma.  It burned everything in it’s path hardened the hearts of those around them, as it slowed down.  Generations of my family have parented and lived in fear! But no MORE! I will no longer couple with fear! I release it’s bondage over me and my family.  Fear will be no more! It will grip us no longer. We will live in the promised land and will delight delight in all of God’s glory.  Fear will own us no longer! We will be free! We are FREE! I am free! The chains have been broken and I have been set free.  The door is open for me to walk through and God has outstretched his hand to help me over the threshold.

There’s a world out there I never knew existed and as I stand on top of the mountain with Him, I can see all that I have been missing.  I’ve been set free! My God and savior has rescued me.  Amazing Grace has always been my heart’s song.  God would give me dreams that I was a singer and Amazing Grace would be the song I would sing.  My heart’s song is coming into fruition and I will make it the song of my family!

Fear, I release you! I no longer will join you! Father God, fill it’s space with your Glory and Majesty! “Free at last. Free at last.  Thank God almighty.  I am free at last!” No longer will I see God as my persecutor, but my loving Father, who loves me to no end and always has… since he knitted me in my mother’s womb.

We are all meant for great things! Sometimes it takes a fall, in order to fly! We need to beat our wings like the butterfly emerging from it’s slumber.  Breaking free from it’s cell and flying high, with the wind of God beneath it’s wings.  Trusting God for the wind to fly and the nectar to eat.  Not worrying about tomorrow, but delighting in today.   For today is a gift and tomorrow isn’t promised.

What are you afraid of? It’s time to release it to God.

Fear is the cement that binds our feet and creates our own tomb.  You cannot live in fear..you just merely exist. JUMP! FLY! SOAR! and SING! 

Say it with me! I am free! I am free! I am free! I have always been free! Now is the hard part…how will you live in freedom and make sure that you allow yourself the freedom to fly!