My New Year’s Resolution


A new year always brings about a sense of urgency and maybe even a sense of despair.  Why? I think in our heart of hearts that we look longingly of what could be and not what has been.  We wish for a future that is not what is happening in the present, but we often don’t change what we are doing in the here and now.  What is this gibberish I’m speaking?! Well….what have you done in the present, to actually make a change for the future? The future will not change itself.  A unicorn will not drop out of heaven farting rainbows and dropping pixie dust.  All kidding aside…what steps are you taking in order to ensure that you will not be the definition of insanity? (doing the same thing over and over again…expecting the same results).  What have you done to change the future to ensure that it is not the same as the past.  You don’t need a new year to do this! You just need the here and now! Take a stand! Say YES! Kick some ass and take NAMES! You don’t need a new number at the end of the year to be Fing AWESOME! You just need YOU!

So how do you start you might say? Well, what is the one thing that you do not what to do? The thing that just popped into your head after reading this…well that my friend is your first step.  That is the mountain under that carpet that you keep tripping over and reason that your future will stay the same as your past.  Have you ever seen a train back up or have you seen it switch tracks? It’s time to pull the lever and go a different direction. I am not saying that what you are doing right now isn’t working, but is it resulting in God’s best for you? Are you in the land of milk and honey that he has promised us? Are you reaping all that you can from what is, what was and what is meant to be? You will never know until you make a change and say YES LORD! I hear YOU! I hear YOU and I want YOUR best for me! Because His best is something that is unimaginable for our mind to decipher! It is that great! I never could have imagined the amazing husband that he had planned for me….not even if I squinted really hard and thought as hard as I could! My mind could not perceive it, because I did not think I could deserve such an amazing person or that this person even existed.  God blew my mind beyond my wildest dreams and he could do the same for you.  He keeps doing it! Over and over! He wants to please and support us. He wants to show us love, but often his love is not in the same direction that we are going.  He gave us free will, but often our will not his will and our will takes us down a rocky path that he didn’t have planned for us.  He doesn’t abandon us, but puts people in our path to break our fall and often guide us back on the path he created for us.

I’ve had two main “spirit guides” in my life that God has given me in my time of need.  One was a person that makes me cry when I think of her and all that she was and all that I miss. She was the epitome of freedom, love, adventure, kindness and truth. She spoke truth over my life and those that were blessed to be in her presence. She was one of God’s greatest gifts to me and a gift that he took away too soon (in my opinion).  She waited for me at the end of every finish line (physically and metaphorically) and I still look for her now and I can feel her presence in the depths of my soul.  I can feel the love she had for me and the love I had for her.  It has not left, but just morphed into the metaphysical.  God put her in my path in order to change my future! HE did this! HE made the here and now a possibility.  He took a lonely, lost, confused and battered sheep and placed it with a Shepard to steward it’s heart and comfort it’s soul.  HE provided a pasture that the sheep did not even now existed and a life that was beyond it’s imagination.

The second person he brought into my life is my “Pocahontas” my guide down the river of life.  The person who has guided me down rocky rivers and who has helped soothe the turmoil in my soul.  A person who speaks truth to what is and provides a catalyst to what could be. HE did this and continues to do this! He never stops interrupting the wind and often turns our boat in a different direction! BUT we often resist the wind and try to go in a different direction.  Instead of sailing with the wind, we go against it.  We try to go our own direction and we wonder why our boat will not sail quickly like the vessel it was meant to be.  Well…in order to sail like we were created to be, we must first set sail from the harbor, go with the wind and throw out the extra weight from our vessel.  We cannot reach our destiny, if we don’t empty our cargo hold.  We need to throw caution to the wind and pull up anchor.  Set sail for new adventures and ride the wind into the future! That is how we change the present! We go with the wind and not with ourselves.  We feel it’s breeze on our body and we accept what is and the direction that it is taking us.  Can you stop for a moment and rest? YES! God built us for rest, reflection and breath! However, the more detours you take will determine your ETA to your destination.

So what will it be? Stay in the present or set sail for the future? A future filled with sparkles and glitter or whatever makes you smile.  It’s time! You know it is! BUT it also means that you need to make a change. Grab a hand and your heart, because you will need a crew to sail your vessel.  Someone to spot the rocky shores, someone to look towards the horizon and someone to help empty the cargo hold.  We were not meant to do life on our own! That is lie! We were meant to do it with a crew! He has chosen our crew, but often we don’t want to accept who HE has chosen for US! I know I didn’t! I thought of every reason why I should say no! I thought of every reason why it wouldn’t work! I thought of every reason why we couldn’t be FRIENDS! I thought of every reason why I could not let them in! THE real truth is that I was protecting my heart and I did not want them to see the JUNK in my TRUNK! I had been sitting on my suitcase for too long and it was busting at the seams! Stuff needed to go because if not I could not continue on the adventure HE had planned for ME! Was it tough? Hell yes! Did it SUCK? Ummmm yea! It’s supposed to! Do you think a marathon is won by skipping and dancing along?! Maybe for some, but for most it is done with sweat, toil, tears and hard work! It’s time to get sweaty and maybe even throw up a little bit.  Because as a wise women once said, “it builds character.” SO go forth and build some CHARACTER this year and race across that finish line and hug the people he put in your life to cheer you on! They are not there by mistake, but were put there for a purpose.  Don’t neglect them or forsake them.  Give them a chance with your heart, you won’t regret it!

My resolution for this year? Love more, forgive often and throw grace out like confetti! Now go ahead and feel the wind….there is a storm coming and it’s time to set sail! For the seas of tomorrow will not change, but the seas of today will become tomorrow.  Don’t let another starlit night go by with your ship in the harbor.  It’s time to use your vessel for what it was created to be! AND that’s something Fing AMAZING!

One thought on “My New Year’s Resolution

  1. Thank you so much for this. You have no idea how much I needed to read this. Amazingly said. It’s time to let go and let my heart shine towards the future I’m destined to become one with. Thank You.


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